GOOD COMPANY
Wherefore art thou, Romeo?

By Paul Stephen
Photo by Paul Stephen
paul.stephen@starnewsonline.com

Enlarge image | Order reprint When the Romeos gather, time passes quicly amid rapid-fire repartee and familiar joviality.

THE ROMEOS Gordon Brown Nickname: “Downtown” Originally from: Newburg, N.Y. Career: Retired to Wilmington eight years ago after career as business executive; retired Air Force lieutenant, air traffic controller John Combs Nicknames: “Jump Start,” “Captain-in-Training” Originally from:North Carolina Graduated: N.C. State, civil engineering Career: Retired as construction engineer Favorite drink: Scotch and water Vincent Cusick Nickname: “Vinny” Career: Retired from New York Police Department, 31 years Marty De Santo Now resides: Wilmington Originally from: Ithaca, N.Y. Career: Retired as manager of natural gas operations Favorite drink: Red wine or beer, depending on weather or time of year Gene Feind Now resides: Hampstead Originally from: Buffalo, N.Y. Career: Management consultant Favorite drink: Vodka on the rocks, with olive Jim Fryar Nickname: “Mile-or-More” Originally from: Wilmington Career: Retired director of sales & marketing, CSX Corporation (formerly Atlantic Coast Line Railroad) John Lupo Originally from: Newark, N.J.; spent most of career in central Ill. Career: Sold educational materials business and retired to Wilmington, 2000 Gordon Murphy Nickname: “Murph” Originally from: Eden, N.C. Career: Spent most of career in Chicago as rep for Karastan Carpets (made in N.C.) Favorite drink: Vodka on the rocks Andy O’Flaherty Originally from: New Jersey Career: Financial services in New York City for 30 years Favorite drink: Anchor Steam beer John H. Sherman Nickname: “Bowling Ball” Now resides: Hampstead, N.C., for the past 23 years Originally from: Darien, Conn. Career: Manufacturing & sales in the paper industry Bill Thorn Nickname: “Commodore” Now resides: Hampstead, N.C. Originally from: Long Island, N.Y. Career: Retired from moving & storage business Favorite drink: Gin on the rocks Angelo Toscano Originally from: New Jersey Career: Retired tool maker, General Motors; retired as chief warrant officer in the New Jersey National Guard, 38 years

hey call themselves the Romeos. If you’ve started to picture a gaggle of rash, rose-toting Italian lover-boys in doublets and hose, think again.
This weekly lunch assembly of Wilmington-area gentlemen is an eclectic dozen ranging in age from 59 to 83 who’ve found the key to a good time is not to take themselves too seriously. The name they picked (inspired in part by the group Tom Brokaw described in The Greatest Generation) is an acronym: Retired Old Men Eating Out.

They aren’t the only Romeos on the dining circuit nationwide, or even in Wilmington (at least one other local group lays claim to the name). But this gathering has been going strong every Friday for more than five years, and it’s even been documented in news clippings and a scrapbook of photographs and notes. Launched in May 1999 by Olde Point resident Bill Thorn (“the Commodore”) as an alternative to golf outings for a few friends in his community, the group grew to its current self-selected limit of 12 as its original members brought in acquaintances from other circles.

You can spot them easily by their attire — classy-looking golf shirts sporting the Romeos logo. The crossed-martini-glasses design was contributed early in the group’s history by ad man Bob Nugent, one of the original 12 who has since bowed out.

The Romeos’ noon gatherings are lively occasions for enjoying food,
drink and camaraderie. The men trade stories and jokes, talk sports (football and basketball in general; N.C. State, the Yankees, and ECU in particular), discuss events in the local news, debate politics.

Today, as with most Fridays for the past two years, Mako’s on U.S. 17 in Scotts Hill is the eatery of choice. “Michael takes good care of us,” says Angelo Toscano, a tool maker who moved here from New Jersey, in praise of restaurant manager Michael Coster. Retired New York police officer Vincent “Vinny” Cusick gives Lynne McLamb, their regular server, high marks as “probably the best waitress we’ve had anyplace.” Others jump in to concur.

These guys do take their table service -- and their food and beverages -- seriously. They like a place that’s roomy enough for the 12 of them, not stuffy or too loud (they bring their own noise to any locale).

They enjoy the seafood and other entrée choices at Mako’s, where they find the specials to be especially good but also consider the chowder, mussels and flounder consistently delicious.

The Romeos have ventured out some weeks to try a few other restaurants around the area. Angelo, who serves as scout, checks out new candidates largely on the basis of the drinks — which, he says only part in jest, should ideally feature “a little bit of ice and a lot of liquor.”

The group has taken a few lunchtime trips by boat or motor home, venturing down the highway to Southport or the Intracoastal Waterway to harborside cafés. They’ve traveled together on an out-of-town golf trip and a fishing expedition. They’ve also hosted fish frys and shrimparoos on a couple of occasions that included wives and children.

On this Friday, the group is a few members shy. Gordon “Downtown” Brown is out of town, as is John Lupo. Gordon “Murph” Murphy is recovering from thoracic surgery. A couple of the fellows have been by to check in on him at home earlier in the week, and they plan to phone him shortly to virtually include him in today’s fun.

Topics bounce back and forth down the table like a beach ball at a Braves game: President Reagan’s funeral. Coach K’s decision to stick around. President Clinton’s book. A bungled bank robbery.

Retired Wall Street broker and Yankees fan Andy O’Flaherty shows up wearing a Mets cap, a clear sign he’s lost a friendly bet.

“Coulda been worse,” says former Ithaca, N.Y., resident Marty De Santo. “It coulda been a Democratic hat.”

“They don’t wear hats,” Vinny shoots back.

Each bit of nonsense begets another.

“We’re missing Murph today,” explains John “Jump-Start” Combs. “He’s our yellow-dog Democrat.” If Democrats are in the minority here, so are native-born Southerners: only Murph and Jump-Start, along with retired CSX railroad sales and marketing director Jim “Mile-or-More” Fryar, hail from North Carolina.

The others are Yankee come-heres (there’s even a Sherman among them -- John T. “Bowling Ball” Sherman who retired to Hampstead 23 years ago).

Colorful nicknames are bestowed at moments of inspiration. Jump-Start acquired his after an incident involving a dead battery on one of the group’s boating excursions. But it might take a few more Bloody Marys to persuade Bowling Ball or Mile-or-More to tell the stories behind theirs.

What do their wives do while the men are occupied for a couple hours every Friday?

“We’d like to know,” Jump-Start laughs. The spouses once threatened to form their own cadre of Juliets. And although including the wives is a rare exception, it’s clear the members have all developed a bond of sincere concern through their lunchtime socializing. They inquire about one another’s families and lend support in times of personal crisis. The time passes quickly amid rapid-fire repartée and familiar joviality.

Gene Feind, a management consultant and the only member of the group still actively employed, rises to leave a few minutes early.

“See ya, pal,” Marty says. The other Romeos bid him goodbye. “He’s gotta go earn the Social Security payments for the rest of us,” they joke. “Work hard, Gene,” Jump-Start teases. “Keep my check coming in.”

The others settle up their tabs and consider their next course of action. It’s a warm summer afternoon, and although parting is always sweet sorrow for this group, the decision won’t be difficult today.

“Time for a nap,” the Commodore says. “Yep.” “Me too.” “See you next week.”

Till next Friday, the Romeos are adjourned.